Shit! It’s my birthday, I am 31 today – on the negative time is ticking away. The positive – for the last three years each birthday was better than the last one.
I did the big one last year, expecting my closest friends to spend time, money and health in a strange city half-way across the country just because I was squeezed out on the 19th March 1983.
So this year I toned it down, which I regreted as I realised despite all the self-improvement I go on about, my social life could really do with re-invigorating.
Leading up to my birthday I decided to set some ‘social’ targets, with the intention that by the time I am 32, I will have got through these.
Have a party
Previously I have had a load of money but been living with my parents or my own place, but no money.
This year I have both! I think it is time I put on a party and invite some of the friends I have made over the years! Hopefully it will be better than this…
Make a new friend
Since I left university I have not really made a new friend, therefore depressingly I have seen my social networks gradually disappear or have friends who have gone on to follow their own dreams.
I would like to add to my social circle with a new friend. That is to have someone whose number is in my phone, I see at least on a monthly basis and who I share social occasions with.
This obviously rules out online friends, people I work with and acquaintances of friends.
Spontaneously have a conversation with strangers
I was reading Day Bang a book that was of interest to me because it was about talking to women outside of the night scene and sober.
In public I see random strangers approach and talk to people, they aren’t told to fuck off, usually a small conversation is initiated, before they go back to their separate lives.
Therefore I want to make having spontaneous short conversation with strangers a habit. I want it to be perfectly natural so that I develop my confident and rid my approach anxiety.
Try a new country with a friend
I am fortunate to have done a lot of travelling in my life. A lot of this I have done alone.
Although I have enjoyed this my main regret is that a friend has not been on hand to share the experiences.
There are many countries I have not been to and I want my next new country to be shared with a friend.
Have a short-term/casual relationship
My last relationship was a major disaster, it destroyed my confidence and it took me over a year to restore the belief I was attractive.
The worst thing was I was needy and pathetic, but I feel I have learned from these major turnoff’s.
I want to have a short-term/casual relationship so that I can finally move on.
Share my knowledge publicly
I love watching TED talks. I fantasize about doing a talk in the same way other men dream they are rock stars.
I have started sharing my thoughts through online blogging, however I would like to transfer this to the real world and start doing some public speaking.
What better way to develop my social skills than share what I know to an audience. Maybe one day I will be half as good as this…
Be creative for my next birthday
My birthday’s seem to go from different levels of tedium dependent on the choice – see a band (unoriginal), go to the movies (boring), have a meal with family (can you say no social life?).
For my 32nd birthday I want to be creative and do something a bit different. At the moment I have no idea what, but that is the purpose, I have one year to work something out….