Sunday Reflections #1

…On mourning the Christmases of the past and a reminder of how not to handle braggers…

Welcome to the first Perfect Manifesto Sunday Reflections.

This post is inspired by the week note format that many professionals use to reflect on their working week, except in these reflections I’ll be sharing various observations from all parts of my life, covering a range of topics, in short snippets that don’t quite justify fitting a full post.

As covered in the name, I’ll be putting these out every Sunday I feel inclined to put down my thoughts.

Let’s start with my reflections from the Christmas period.

Beating the Holiday Blues…

For some reason I’ve felt a lot more sadness over Christmas and New Year – I couldn’t wait for it all to be over and get into a January routine.

Over the recent years I’ve had an overwhelming feeling that “it doesn’t feel like Christmas” as I come away from every dinner on 25th December.

This is not intended as an insult to the relatives who graciously invite us over each year, I recognise their efforts and am always grateful we have family who want to invite us to be part of their day.

I thought these feelings stemmed from being grown up – what’s to be excited about? Presents? I’m a grown man and can buy what I want.

Perhaps it was adapting to different ways other families celebrate Christmas. Meeting my wife and going to the in-laws made me realise, other families have their own unique traditions.

But in fairness I acknowledge even when spending time with my parents, Christmas doesn’t feel right anymore.

Then it hit me, my sadness came from mourning the absence of relatives who were no longer with us – it was normal to have a grandparent or two around the table, but now they were gone, in moments we can never recreate.

I don’t have the answer how I can beat these holiday blues, I can’t turn back time to get my grandparents back, so instead I focus on the following:

1. Appreciating the moments I get with my family (old and new) while I still can.
2. Creating Christmas moments for my own children so they too can have found memories of Christmases past.

Handling Braggers…

Something I noticed over the holiday period was my post How To Deal With A Bragger was getting a lot of attention.

It’s one of my most popular posts, but throughout December it’s views more than doubled its usual average.

I’m no believer in coincidences and believe sudden surges in demands on posts reflect current events, and my theory is that as a lot people will see relatives they only see at this time of year, and a lot office parties going on, that they’ll also have to endure a more than average level of boasting.

When handling braggers, one of the key pieces of advice I suggested in the original post was to avoid mocking them, as this will just make you appear insecure, and the one in the wrong.

From my own recent experiences of seeing family I’ve witnessed a relative who made this mistake and felt the need to put down a side of the family that’s notorious for it’s boast by throwing out mindless insults on their looks

This just made the individual appear jealous, made them look bad, and managed to turn a pleasant family get together into an uncomfortable experience.

I’ll reiterate that calling a bragger names behind their back, doesn’t do you any good – the bragger will keep bragging, and you just look bad.

Remember two wrongs don’t make a right.

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Thank you for reading

Wishing you the best in your success

James @Perfect Manifesto

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