This week…
This week I’ve been putting in motions to organise a reunion with old friends. This is a long delay, not just due to lockdown restrictions which have been in place over the past year, but also a reluctance on my part to find the motivation to put the movements to actually organise a get to together.
Something that I have questioned is why? When I’ve had freedoms to do so, why have I been putting off this reunion for so long?
Then I realised the reason – seeing old friends would mean reuniting in the old town where I grew up, a place I where I wouldn’t say the memories was necessarily bad… disappointing maybe, but not bad… either way I don’t have fond memories that make me want to return.
My old town was also one of those typical small-town mentality, so I have lots of memories of people looking down the success of others, and dismissing some of my aspirations for my own dreams.
The best decision I made was leaving that place. But occasionally I go back – to see old friends who never left the town.
Perception…
Or… perhaps my perception of the place has been skewed by the memories I’ve experienced, and it’s just your average normal small town in the north of England and I’m holding onto some perception biases, based on a few unpleasant incidents from the past.
This isn’t the first-time bad experiences, have impacted how I feel about a something. About a decade ago I got my phone stolen seeing one of my favourite bands, the Dropkick Murphy’s.
Now whenever they release a new album, I can’t help thinking how hackneyed and cliched it sounds, like the sound of a party band, that’s hired on St Patrick’s day to help sell the Guinness.
Maybe that is true, maybe the material isn’t as good as it used to be, or maybe it’s just someone pick pocketing my phone changed my perception of the band so much that I can’t enjoy their music anymore.
Have you experienced anything that’s changed your perception, of something? It could be a place you used to love going, or a band, hobby or interest you once enjoyed.
For me, I’m now psyching myself up for that day I don’t drive past my old town, rolling off the exit on the M62, heading down that bland, drab never ending road, to see a sea of depressing concrete, in a town that never gave me much love.
Take care of yourself and see you next time.
James @Perfect Manifesto
Perfect Manifesto 
Although I’ve always heard it said that we should never look back, only forward, I do everything I can to avoid anything that brings back bad memories, James. That includes going back to where I grew up. However, I often look back on the past because I have many happy memories stored there. And the town where I grew up does have some happy memories, but it doesn’t feel bad when I’m not physically there.
I’m guessing it’s not possible to have the reunion you spoke of away from the town you spoke about? You’re faced with a tough decision. I wouldn’t know whether to put myself first or those old friends first, especially if the reunion is the only thing some of them have to look forward to.
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It’s a funny situation really Hugh, some of my friends still live there and are the types who’ll never leave. Back when I was working from tge office we had a nice regular meeting after work in a central location good for all to get to. Since working from home we’ve never had reason to go. I’ll suck up returning home until I think of something else!
Thanks for sharing your personal experiences Hugh, it does make me think I should focus on the happy memories I had there rather than the bad that have consumed my perception of the place.
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