Good day to you all, hope you are keeping sane.
With isolation and no gym I’ve taken the opportunity to get my garden in order.
It’s not always easy as I’d much rather spend the time with my children than working alone outside.
The other day my daughter sat down to watch the latest Secret Life of Pets movie, so it seemed like a good time to start with the basics and give the overgrown winter lawn a trim.
As I fought through deep grass, she got bored of the movie and decided to watch me through the window.
I continued to press on with the tedious job and she sat there, patiently watching my every move.
This made me realise what a precious, innocent age she was – not only was she oblivious to everything going on in the world, but in her eyes, daddy is a hero.
And this is quite humbling. No matter how much of a loser in life you feel your child is of an age where you are the main male role model in life.
A young child has a great need of their dad, they will:
- come to you for comfort when you’re not feeling too great
- want you to pick them up when you feel tired
- ask you to fix something when you don’t know the solution
- have belief in you to be able to do anything.
This pushes you to the limits of your ability – you realise how much more you can do, bringing out a new potential and confidence you have never seen.
You question why you even doubt yourself.
If you read a lot of dad blogs you will come across a similar statement
“having a child saved me”
I think this is because when you have someone who looks up to you, you suddenly start questioning whether you are living up to that ideal vision the child has of you, so you work to change your habits.
It’s no coincidence I don’t drink as much as I used to, have greater ambitions and always make time dedicating to giving my children attention.
Basically, it’s a fight to be the hero they see.
Nothing lasts forever
In Child Protection I witnessed this special connection with dads and their young children. The only difference was they would be a shitty dad and the child still worshiped them.
At the time I didn’t understand why, but now realise this is a phase of any child thinking their dad is infallible.
My daughter will grow and become less attached to me, more independent, even realising I am a flawed human being like everyone else.
For the poor neglected kids with the bad dad they’ll probably grow to resent their father.
But, for the man who wants to be a good dad it’s striving to keep the hero image alive as long as possible and being a good role model.
As a father of daughters it’s important they understand how a man is supposed to treat women.
This is an inspiring moment for me, making me determined to keep working hard, having ambitions and giving in return just as much love as I receive from my children.
When my daughters get to a critical thinking age I want them to see an inspiration rather than dead beat loser.
Be the hero they see