Reflection is a beneficial practice.

Taking the time to sit down to examine your progress and achievements is useful for realising how far you’ve come.

You’ll feel a growing sense of gratitude, when you recognise all the things in your life you have.

It’s a powerful feeling knowing a lot of things you have now are a result of small daily actions from 15 years ago, building up to a better life.

“Everything I dreamed of becoming when I was 18 has now been achieved”

Was a thought that came to me as I reflected while enjoying the view of a Greek shoreline.

In the scheme of wants and desires my aspirations as an 18-year-old were quite simple:

• A loving relationship
• A job with career prospects
• A family
• My own home

I’m grateful for the process I’ve undertaken and my own ability to work hard and endure.

The life I have didn’t happen overnight, in fact there were various snags along the way, just eight short years ago things got worse.

You might call it rock bottom – I’d failed to start a career in another part of the country, leaving me jobless, in debt, living back with parents and, to top it off struggling to get over a painful breakup.

Self-improvement literature suggests to imagine a positive image where you would like to be in the future:

“think it and you will become it”.

I did the opposite – I imagined myself as a late thirty-something, penniless at a dinner party trying to invite an attractive young lady back to my place, but anxious how I was going to sneak her in my parents house without thinking I was a total loser!

Imagining a life of what happens if things don’t change is far more effective, imaging a sense of dread being more motivating than visualising a utopia future.

The fear of this happening drove me to work on myself, have a clear vision, have goals and got me back on track leading to the wonderful life I now enjoy.

Rules to a better life:

Embrace that dread

If you know the life you are living in your gut will not lead to what you want, then take full ownership of that fear and use it as fuel to drive the changes you must make to succeed.

Be self-aware

I thought I was something special – educated, physically fit, lots to offer.  And yet my life was dwindling out of control and I was lonely.

It was only when I became self-aware that I’m not doing as well as I would like, I could make plans to improve and work on my weaknesses.

Keep reflecting, measuring progress

Set your goals, have your vision, understand your values, but make sure three or four times a year you are taking time to reflect if you are making progress.

If you aren’t progressing, ask:

Why?  And what needs to change?

Then take action to do better and change.

Keep trying

There will be lots of failures on the way, it’s easy to lose faith and give up.

If there is something you really want, you will keep trying even if it means losing, being humiliated, or struggling to make progress.

To quit suggests it’s not something wanted bad enough.

Always have goals and ambitions

Have goals and ambitions so that you have a target of something to work towards.

You might not know what you want in life, but it’s better to aim for something than nothing.

Goal setting is a useful practice and a great way of measuring progress and whether you are successful or not in your desired area.

Don’t expect to be rescued

No one owes you anything.

Let me repeat that no one owes you anything.

There are lots of people helpless, waiting to be rescued, expecting others to give them opportunities..-

You are responsible for your actions.  Take ownership and go get your goals!

Celebrate the successes

Don’t get too caught up to forget how far you’ve come.

Recognise what you have achieved and be grateful for what you have got and your potential, you’ve been put on this earth to do great things… keep going!

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