“One day I decided I wanted to be positive, so I chose to be…”

Why be negative?

As you undertake the No Complaining Challenge, it’s a simple question to ask yourself.

An effective tip when attempting not to complain, is to identify the sources that set you off grumbling – whether it’s bad drivers, a manager who keeps putting on you, or a certain friend who brags constantly.

You soon notice trends, which enables you to plan how you manage your reactions – changing the triggers that set you off.

Complaining is one of the many heads of the negativity snake, and if you’ve a half-empty view on life, then you’re probably going to look at most things you come across in life in an unfavourable manner

“If you’ve nothing nice to say, don’t say it…”

Complaining is a sign of a bleak outlook on life – those negative thoughts and feelings trapped deep inside, verbalised to share with people around you.

There was a reason George Washington had men shot for complaining during the war of independence – he recognised how toxic such negative views was to his army.

If not stopped, this would pollute the minds of everyone around them, resulting in a mutiny and the cause being lost.

Nowadays you won’t get shot for complaining, but it does have social stigmas – no one likes complainers, except other complainers.

It doesn’t have to be this way, you are blessed because negativity is an emotion, so can easily be change with how you think.

You may think it’s difficult to change, but it’s not like losing an arm, where no matter how much you wish, it won’t grow back.

With your mind, you can alter how you think, reinforcing positive thoughts with a range of exercises.

In my own upbringing I was a negative person, a series of events led me to having low self-esteem, no belief in my abilities, and the success of others left me feeling inadequate.

“Why can’t I have nice things like…”

Thinking back, I’m glad I was able to work on my mindset, as these types of feelings never made me feel great.

One day I decided I wanted to be positive, so I chose to be.

It seems simple – how can you just one day decide to reprogram how you think and feeling?

Well the good things is – your feelings aren’t facts.

A fact is difficult/impossible to change, because it isn’t in your control.


Fact: Donald Trump is the president of the United States.

How you feel however, that is totally within your power.

Feeling: Donald Trump is the president of the United States, which isn’t my choice.  So I don’t feel bad/angry, I’m not going to engage in news media about what he has done, or complain on all my social media accounts at every opportunity about him.

If you are a person whose natural response is to see things negatively try doing more of the following:

  • Recognise what is within your control and accept what isn’t (focus on the former)
  • Say only nice things about a person/idea (or don’t say anything)
  • Use positive affirmations
  • Practice compassionate self-talk
  • Challenge yourself when talking negatively (reflect on this and set plans to avoid)
  • Consume positive material
  • Surround yourself with positive people
  • Practice gratitude
  • Realise how far you’ve progressed

There is no simple trick to resolve this, you just need to keep going about your day, observe and identify good things and keep yourself accountable when you behave in a negative manner.

Good luck!

Take the No Complaining Challenge 2020 for three weeks to become a more positive you!

<<Next post in the No Complaining Challenge 2020 Series What Are You Grateful For?>>

Take the No Complaining Challenge

This is part of a series of posts for the No Complaining Challenge 2020.

I challenge you to try not to complain for the next three weeks and see what happens.

Everytime you fail (and you will) make a note of what the trigger is and set a plan of action in place avoid falling into this trap.

When you do this you’re going to fail, fail, fail again.  But when you do, at least you know not to complain about it…

I’ll be providing posts to inspire you to a more positive life – make sure you don’t miss out and subscribe to Perfect Manifesto.

Are you in?  Join the newsletter:

Over the next three weeks I will be sharing content to inspire you to be more positive in your approach to life – if you join my newsletter we can keep in touch and you’ll receive more great content about being a father, taking care of your health and striving for life long self-improvement:

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3 thoughts on “Why Be Negative?

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